August 14, 2011

• Four more days!!!

  In four days I will see my dear aunt who I have not seen since I was stolen away from her at the age of 13. She opened her home and her heart to me when my own parents found better things to do than be parents. My father was a truck driver which i understood, but for some reason my mother had to accompany him. She was unlicensed and was just along for the ride. They were gone for weeks and months at a time with out so much as a phone call. When they reappeared they showed up at school one day and learned that socail workers had been talking to me and i assume my sisters. Within a week or two we moved accross the country. I lost the only stability I remembered from my childhood. I looked for and got close to finding my aunt a couple of times. Thanks to Facebook I have found and maintained contact with her. 

  Nina and I are flying to texas on thursday! I am very excited and nervous at the same time. I am obviously not the person I was then. But I am more worried of being a disappointment to her. I know it is silly but I am. I know in my heart its not a real issue, but my experience with family in the past makes me leary. Then I feel bad for lumping her into that disfunctional heap of morons.

   

  So I am focusing on the fact that in 4 days I will get to enjoy some REAL sunshine for 9 days at least this summer. School starts in two weeks so we will get back just in time to ship miss Nina off to school for 7th grade! I will have a senior and preschooler man the sound of that is kind of wild LOL....

   

  Still going fine with baby. Not much to report really. Not much morning sickness of course that could change anytime now. I just hope not on the plane to or from lol.

   

  My entire family is still not speaking to me and ya know for once I am ok with that. By entire family I mean sisters, mother, neices, nephews, and all other aunts/cousins except my aunt Mary. Thier loss really. I don't even care anymore. I have more important things to do other than worry about their crap or their opinions. 

  I can understand being concerned about the baby, but they did not need to call my daughter or I freaks and assume that this baby was "screwed up" (their words) and just flat out be hurtful about it. It isn't like I don't know the risks and accept them. I ask nothing from them. Not even their support. But anyway I have wasted enough time talking about them as is. I have some packing to prepare for tomorrow LOL.

   

  • 2:45 am
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